25 YEARS and still killing!!!
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LET THERE BE ZEP by Len Callo 2005 Summer of '77 I went to see Led Zeppelin had a vile of liquid acid and my old mans credit card went blazin' up w/ Hair Bear and K-dog met us up there with Mulls and Chris Blevins and Debbie Alvarez been smokin' from a plastic power hitter - no jokin' the trails were comin' strong drinkin whiskey beer and tequilla the music fueled the party on we’re bakin' in the California Sunshine Judahs Priest got booed off stage Big trails at the Oakland Coliseum Derringer stole the show that day Chorus: 3 hours we waited for the Zeppelin 3 hours we waited for them to play the trails swirled in the California clouds 3 hours somethin' went wrong that day Turns out one of Bill Grahms flunkies slapped Peter Grants 10 year old son Grant 'n' Bohnam flew in a drug fueled rage And a severe bloody beating had begun Cops came in Grant 'n' Bohnam went downtown while 60 thousand baked away 3 hours waitin' for Led Zeppelin Derringer stole the show that day Chorus Spoken: The cops 'n' Bill Grahm new if the show didn't go on they would have one ugly riot on their hands So,without droppin' the charges they O.R.d the 2 and got 'em back to do the show I remember flying on acid me 'n' Debbie Alvarez inched through the crowd I remember howling with laughter looking at Bill Grahm ON STAGE with Zep. I mean he was off to side as if he was watching from the wings but he was fully OUT ON THE STAGE. It wasn't 'till later that we would learn of the bizarre story behind the scenes. I remember people pointing and laughing and screaming "what an egomaniacal sonofabitch!" It was truly a farce to behold And while it was hard to agrue against what a jerk Bill Grahm was he DID bring a lot fun times and great bands hisDay on the Green shows Over the years we saw Ronnie Van Zant and Lynyrd Skynryd Bon Scott and AC/CD. Rory Gallahger Jethrothe Who Tull Johnny and Edgar Winter Pin Floyd and as it turned out, that was the last show Zepplin ever played in the U.S. So what the fuck |
Volcano by Len Callo 7-9-08 The night was gettin' bright by the light of the moon Things would get much brighter on this night very soon But I never knew just how - or just how true The Goddess filled the sky with a pillar of smoke But I realized I still had hope to maybe leave behind an encouraging word or 2 (Chorus) (and then) there was FIRE IN THE SKY! and in the Goddess eye The natives never saw it coming They could only wave goodbye Clutching my axe I just ran down the road Looking back to see the Volcano explode Yes it was too true - the blue island blew Fire and brimstone rained down on all Against this mountain we were all too small That's when I knew what I had to do (Chorus) -solo- I climbed up the cliff to the Temple above and prayed to the Goddess to show her love and spare the helpless people down in the village below That's when the clouds burst open with rain and put out the fires and the villagers pain The people were safe but she left the lava to flow (Ch) There was FIRE IN THE SKY and in the Goddess eye The natives praised the Goddess Pele who didn't let them die There was FIRE IN THE SKY the Goddess had to cry She gave her worst then took mercy and couldn't say goodbye |
THESE OLD SHOES by Len Callo 2006 These old shoes There ain't much tread left on These old shoes The leather's worn and cracked on These old shoes Oh but the places they have been The stories they could tell Been to Hell and back again and wearin' it quite well These old shoes behold the tortured sole on These old shoes the road beneath them BURNS in these old Shoes But there's no need to shed a tear they've carried on so long Although for them the end is near the road continues on SOLO Remember well how they wore on when looking at your self It's better to have traveled on than sit there on a shelf These old shoes It's time to say goodbye to These old shoes nothin' left to lose in These old Shoes |
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SIBLEY by Len Callo 2006 Had a cruel nasty women All she do is treat me mean She was ruthless and so evil like no one I ever seen When she swung at me with a sickle I pushed her in the cotton bale machine They found me at the delta Tracked me down with a bloodhound dog Right there at the water Bitten hard by that dirty dog I was cryin' and a shakin' deep inside a hollow log They gonna hang me in the mornin' Hang me high from the old elm tree With the howlin' wind blowin' Swinging there for all to see But I know I'll go to Heavan only the Lord will have mercy for me |
SIT ON MY FACE TONIGHT by Bill McKay and Len Callo 1980/2006 I met a young lady down in San Jose I told the young lady that I needed a lay She had a nice face but we needed a place I said "Oh baby wont you sit on my face" Baby baby sit on my face tonight I took her to a place out on highway 9 I'm tellin' you people this lady was fine She got on my case 'cause I wanted 4th base I said "Oh baby wont you sit on my face" Baby baby sit on my face tonight chorus: Sit on my face tonight (repeat) I met a young lady down in San Jose I told the young lady I was BIL McKAY! She had a nice face but we needed a place I said "Oh baby wont you sit on my face" Baby baby sit on my face tonight chorus: Sit on my face tonight (repeat) |
SWILLIN’ KILLIN MAN by len callo 8-7-05 Life's too short fer drinkin’ milk ‘n’ watchin’ bullshit on TV I caint abide no sissified wimperin’ simp snivelin’ at me I don’t take no orders 9-5 is just too hard 'n' I don't git no pleasure plantin' daffodils in the yard CHORUS: I'm a beer killin', whiskey swillin', guitar slingin' man Fussin' cussin', spittin' kickin', everywhere I can I'm a show boatin', gun toatin', rabble rousin' man I'll ball yer ol' lady in the back of my Chevy van LORD I love my whiskey and Budwieser in the can I love thrashin' on this guitar with my rockin' rollin' band 'n' God DAMN I love the ladies with their breasts up in the air big er small I don't care at all as long as there's a pair CHORUS: I'm a beer killin', whiskey swillin', guitar slingin' man I like singin' dirty songs with this here rockin' band I’m a pig stickin’, poon’, lickin’, cigar chompin’ man I wont quite till the sun comes up or they throw me in the can I got lots a demons that keep me up at night my friend Goin’ t’ church and good hard work sure aint one of them Chorus: |
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I WANNA SELL OUT by Len Callo 2006 I wanna sell out but nobody's buyin' I wanna sell OUT lord knows that I'm tryin' I'll sing a song about soda pop a bunny rabbit that never stops I'll sing to you of cheap shampoo crunchy chips and salsa too I wanna sell-------OUT I gotta sell OUT I really need the money I wanna sell out Hey! there goes that bunny I'll write a song of tater tots an SUV or sweet pop tarts cheap tampons or underwear write the check I just don't care I wanna sell ------OUT SOLO/commercials I wanna sell out but nobody's buyin' I gotta sell out If I'm lyin' I'm dyin' telephones and radios chocolate covered pantyhose charcoal filtered diamond rings marital aids and rubber things chocolate chip deodorant anal fizzure rubber plant smelly gel for diaper rash hemmeroidal corned beef hash air conditioned dog house computer program for your mouse cat food dog food paper hats lead crystal baseball bats leather scented propane gas squeeze the charmin wipe your ass creme soda creme de Menthe creme corn and creme cement pizza douche taco sauce just write the check your the boss! I wanna sell--------OUT |
DEVIL'S PECKER ROAD by Len Callo 2002 In 1827 from the mountain to the town the people there would build a road for going up and down But greedy Jim O'Flanery made the tressel much too weak and 7 townsmen perished falling 700 feet The people they took umbrage with old O'Flanery so they hung him from his tressel for all the town to see He swore as he was dyin' there was one thing he would do "When I get back from Hell I'll stick the Devil's dick in you." They called it Devil's Pecker Road Devil's Pecker Road 7 and O'Flanery on Devil's Pecker road In 1847 On the mountain they found "GOLD"! but mysteries would happen there on Devil's Pecker Road 5 would die by fire The quake took 40 more Any man who touched the gold payed for it with his soul On Devil's Pecker Road, Devil's Pecker Road Touch the gold and lose your soul on Devil's Pecker Road In 1957 Betty-Sue met Bobby-Joe The drove up Devil's Pecker just to be alone While balling in the back seat they felt an awful chill and then their Chevy drove away with no one at the wheel Down Devil's Pecker Road, Devil's Pecker Road The Devil and O'Flanery drive Devil's Pecker Road |
I DON'T LIKE THE WAY YOU STINK (formerly I DONT DRINK) by Len Callo 1982 IT WAS A QUARTER TO 3 IN HER 280 Z WHEN SHE LOOKED AT ME AND SAID "HEY HONEY TRY SOME STEAMING TEA FROM MY RAGING SEA" LOOKED LIKE V.D. I SAID "NO NOT ME" ch: I SAID "NO THANKS. I DON'T DRINK. I DON'T LIKE THE WAY YOU STINK OH NO NONE FOR ME YOU AINT QUITE MY CUP O' TEA" AND THEN SHE TOOK OFF HER PANTS AND THEN SHE TOOK OFF HER SHIRT AND THEN SHE TOOK OUT A KNIFE JUST SCRAPE OFF THE DIRT AND THEN I STARTED TO GAG AND THEN I STARTED TO CHOKE AND THEN I STARTED TO THINK THIS WAS NO JOKE I SAID "NO THANKS. I DON'T DRINK. I DON'T LIKE THE WAY YOU STINK OH NO NONE FOR ME YOU AINT QUITE MY CUP O' TEA" solo AND THEN LATER ON IWAS SITTIN' AT HOME WAITIN' ALL ALONE RIGHT BY THE TELEPHONE THAT'S WHEN MY BABY CALLED NEEDED TO BE BALLED SAID "GET ON YER MEAN MACHINE DON'T FORGET THE VASALINE" SO KICKED MY HOG AND I SPLIT MY PAD WITH MY SHADES AND SUADES I WAS LOOKIN' BAD I GOT TO HER PLACE SHE SAT ON MY FACE IT WAS LIKE SNORTIN' MACE I WAS IN OUTER SPACE SCREAMIN' BABY PLEASE GET DOWN ON YOUR KNEES AND TASTE MY DISEASE SHE SAID "NO THANK YOU PLEASE!" I SAID "NO THANKS. I DON'T DRINK. I DON'T LIKE THE WAY YOU STINK OH NO NONE FOR ME YOU AINT QUITE MY CUP O' TEA" |
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ABDUCTEE by Karl Gray 2005 Rolling down a Panhandle back road. Long about half passed Ten. Bright lights commin hard and fast. Thought it was the cops, better think again. Laying face down in the gravel Was about the next thing I known. Crawled back to my ol' Chevy truck. But all four tires, they was blown. Chorus: Wife want's to know how I got them scars. Daughter wonders why I just stare at the stars. My friends all think something’s wrong with me. I just keep askin‘… how on earth can this be? Lost my job at the Foundry. Lost all of my friends. Doctor says nothing’s wrong with me. The truth will come out in the end. I guess it's just our little secret. Them and what they made out of me. Townsfolk laugh and talk behind my back “There goes the abductee” Chorus: Solo Well I don't remember no details. But when I drift off late at night. I dream of that Panhandle back road. And going away with them lights. Chorus |
THE BALLAD OF NUNZIO CAPELLI by Len Callo 2008 TUESDAY AT 3 MRS. TONY FAZZIO AND ME TRIPPING THE LIGHT DOING THINGS WRONG AND DOIN’ THEM JUST RIGHT WONT BE LONG TILL I AM TAKIN’ FLIGHT TUESDAY AT 4 GRAB MY HAT I’M HEADED OUT THE DOOR STRAIGHTEN MY TIE ONCE AGAIN I FORGOT TO SAY GOODBYE BUT LATER ON I’LL GIVE HER A WINK OF MY EYE YA GOTTA BE SLY WHEN YER LIVIN’ IN A LIE ESPECIALLY WHEN IT’S ACASE OF DO OR DIE SATURDAY NIGHT STRIP CLUB LIFE TREATIN’ ME JUST RIGHT ANOTHER DRINK OR THREE TONY FAZZIO WANTS A WORD WITH ME THE ANGER IN HIS EYE IS EASY TO SEE A MAFIOSO WIFE IS NOT THE PLACE TO BE WHEN YA ROLL THE DICE THERE IS NO GAURANTEE SUNDAY AT 10 MRS. TONY FAZZIO CALLING AGAIN I’M NOT TAKIN’ CALLS GOT 2 BROKEN ARMS AND 2 BROKEN BALLS CRACK RIBS CRACKED KNEE & HEAD & THAT AINT ALL NOT BAD FOR A BEATING AND 2 STORY FALL MONDAY AT NOON MRS. JAKE SCOPAZZI WILL BE HERE SOON AT IT AGAIN AGAIN AND AGAIN AND AGAIN AND AGAIN AND AGAIN DOING THINGS WRONG AND DOIN’ THEM JUST RIGHT WONT BE AGAIN TILL I AM TAKIN’ FLIGHT I GUESS I’M NEVER GONNA SEE THE LIGHT |
MANKUTA MAN and GERBIL BOY by Len Callo and Jon Mankuta 2006 Intro/Chorus: Mankuta Man and Gerbil Boy -Repeat- Jonathan was quiet boy Workin’ in a Porno Store He never got any action though Life was a total bore One Day He and his Gerbil fell in To Vat of Radioactive K.Y. Jon’s Penis grew and his Gerbal did too And now the both of them Fly CHORUS: (now here Cums) Mankuta Man and Gerbil Boy Repeat Vowing to use his Super Penis to defend the world of porn, On that day Mankuta Man and Gerbil Boy WERE BORN...!!! But Twisted Rev. Cantaloni from the Christian Coalition Made Wiping out Pornagraphy his Twisted Holy Mission They squared off to Battle in the middle of Times Square Mankuta-Man’s super Penis ready to Destroy Then a Video came on the Screen overhead Showed the Reverend diddling a little boy This revelation exposed him to the crowd And took Reverend Canteloni by surprise Then Mankuta-Man shot a mighty blast from his cock Hit the Reverend right between the Eyes! CHORUS: The Crowd was cheering as they took the Reverend away “The world of Porn is safe for now” Mankuta-Man would say But where is Gerbil Boy in all of this commotion? “I’m over here” he said “with the Video in slow Motion” CHORUS: And so for now the world is safe to see what they wish to see but beware boy's 'n' girls there are people out there who never want you to be free Chorus Solo end |